Joffrey's Bizarre Adventure
by Giovanna Giorno
Summary: Or more correctly, Joseph Joestar found himself reincarnated into Joffrey Baratheon. Lulz ensues. AU Crackfic treated somewhat seriously. Read at the cost of your sanity. Rated T for swearwords and Joseph being dirty old man. Not that things would be easy for him though; (UNFINISHED - WILL BE REWRITTEN LATER)
1. Chapter 1

**Joffrey's Bizarre Adventure**

...

 _Or more correctly, Joseph Joestar found himself reincarnated into Joffrey "Baratheon". Lulz ensues._

* * *

 **Chapter 1 : Prologue**

"Holy shit!" Joseh groaned as he tried to sat up, but he just found that he can't. He tried to open his eyes, but everything is black and dark, and everywhere seems to be tightly constricted by fleshy membranes while he lies in a crouching position. Speaking of which, as his senses returned alongside his consciousness, everything around him felt warm and wet too.

Joseph calmed himself, trying to control his breath but much to his surprise, everything around him felt like warm water, but at the same time he doesn't felt as if he is drowning in it, so, he wondered what happened, and for a while, he remembered that his last hazy memory is him going asleep in his house and he thinks he heard something.

As Joseph tried to use his ears, he heard people speaking somewhere else. Sounds like a woman spewing what felt like foreign swearwords while a man also speaking as if trying to calm said woman. And something felt around him as if he is... pushed... out of this... whatever place. He tried to make sense of this before he felt a constricting pain on his head and "OH MY GOOOOD!" shouted Joseph as he felt his head and body squeezed from a very tight place, and as he opened his eyes, he ends up looking upon a golden locks of hair and a smiling face of a giant woman, dressed in loose red cloth with a golden lion embroidery. And as he tried to look at the sides, he also looked upon a yellow banner with black stag, along with an old man, also a giant, and several gigantic servants moving around in a blur. All of them speak something, but the language seems foreign in his ears too.

It dawned on him now, he must missed something quite important here, as he felt himself handled with big hands and placed at the giant golden haired woman's bosom. Joseph tried to make sense of this as he involuntarily shuddered at the implication of it, and the following facts began to formed in his head.

1) It seems as if he was literally born again, and that means he must be already dead soon after his last recollection of memory.

2) His last memory are himself going to sleep as an old man, a ninety-two years old man, at that.

3) He didn't really believe in reincarnation, but everything here points out to this.

4) HE WAS DEAD AND BORN AGAIN.

Joseph ends up trying to think in silence, trying to contemplate his fate, but the surrounding giants seems to speaking in worried tone and before he could react, the bearded old man lifted him up high, feet first, and smacked his ass, HARD.

"OH FUCK! OH SHIT! OH FUCK! DAMMIT YOU FUCKING OLD MAN!" Joseph shouted and he ends up trying to mutter every curses he learned in his, now technically previous life, but what he heard is merely a babbled voice of baby cries, just like when he first handled Holy as a baby, or when he first found Shizuka at that matter. And at this point Joseph feels an irony in knowing firsthand, that baby's cries could be said baby swearing in curses over this situation.

He does felt himself end up handled back into said golden haired woman, who nuzzled him softly with her soft cheeks, and Joseph involuntarily wince, thinking that this must be his new mother. Now if some things such as the Joestar bloodline do end up in repetition of reincarnations turned to be true, perhaps...

His mother is definitely NOT his own great-granddaughter Jolyne, even if she color her hair completely golden, her face is really different. Maybe she is Josuke's wife or maybe even further down the line...

It was in the middle of that important line of thoughts that he noticed that he is definitely not in a hospital, and everything seems to be strangely medieval here. He'd have been tempted to crawl off and take a good look around him, but a wooden door opened and a black haired, yellow and black wearing giant of a man entered flanked by a golden haired giant of a man wearing a white cloak and medieval armor. Said black haired, blue eyed man lifted him high and kissed him off his cheek while roaring something.

'Must be my new father then.' Joseph mused while he heard booming laughs at the same time.

Damn, he feels really tired now, and he just want to get a good sleep.

"Joffrey" Joseph could hear his mother whispered, and the room goes in cheer.

So his new name seems to be Joffrey now...

* * *

 **Joffrey/Joseph I**

 **287 AC**

'Man, being an infant sucks, but being an infant stuck on a medieval world definitely take the cake.' thought Joseph/Joffrey while trying to make sense of himself left on top of a big bed, with several stuffed lion dolls and wooden swords cluttered around him. Oh yes, the servants definitely catered to his every whim, and his mother is a good, if overly doting one, but still, he is a ninety-something years old guy stuck in the body of a year old baby.

And medieval diapers definitely sucks, as Joffrey/Joseph experienced firsthand with having forced to sleep with wet feeling between his legs several times. He pitied the poor servants who end up changing his diapers everyday while his high and mighty Queen of a mother usually don't.

Oh yes, his recollection of his old life as Joseph Joestar is still going strong, but time to time, it made him feel uneasy. Sure, being a Joestar with a ton of adventure is good, but still, sucking on some women's boobs for milk never felt more awkward when he thinks himself as Joseph Joestar, a ninety-something man, and yes, when he meant 'some women' he really meant it, as apparently his mother felt her need to have sexy figures outweigh her duty of breastfeeding him, so there's the wet nurses. When he thinks himself as Joffrey Baratheon however, as a year old infant, it felt a bit less awkward doing his baby stuffs, but still...

Deep in his mind, his old Joseph Joestar mind, he wondered if this is the result of his hamon training, or his stand powers, that he end up not forgetting his old life at all. In fact, Joseph could imagine he does actually transit on some sort of afterlife, but somehow escaping the memory-erasing mechanism or spell or whatever by sheer dumb luck, and end up reborn either across time and space or in another universe altogether, with his memories intact. And to his luck, end up named JOffrey as well. He already imagined himself to be called 'JOJO' once again in the future, to be really fair.

At least he still remembered how to calm himself, so as he sat himself in a meditative position, controlled his breaths and focused his mind.

'Oh great, I could still access my Hamon training, but it seems that I couldn't summon my stand... yet...' thought Joffrey while he felt the familiar energy going around him. Well, there some reasons on why he tried his best to regain his access to his previous life's powers, first of all, is that he found himself actually being the firstborn Prince in some medieval Kingdom, and second, a big majority of people here seems not to be the trustworthy type, and yes, even his own mother, so... 'better be prepared than sorry'.

"Joffrey sweetheart, why aren't you sleep already?" purred his mother while lifting him up into her big, supple bosom (deep in his mind, the dirty mind of Joseph Joestar trying to supress the involuntary assessment of his own mother's assets to no avail, the red low cut dress didn't even help). "What are you doing, my little Lion?"

Joffrey/Joseph opened his eyes and trying to avert his eyes from his mother's cleavages (BAD JOSEPH! BAD JOSEPH!) as well as putting his most innocent face for his mother to see. She didn't seem to notice anything wrong aside of founding her baby sat in crosslegged position however, and as she slung Joffrey/Joseph and carried him outside. Joffrey/Joseph sighed while trying himself to will himself to sleep.

As his mother softly caressed his golden hair, Joseph tried to think himself more as Joffrey, but for some reasons, he felt a big sense of dread waiting, and this time this seems to be worse than when he faced the Pillar Men, or DIO, or the murderers at Morioh... but still.

Whatever...

...

* * *

 _Author's Note : Next chapter would be a more-or-less direct timeskip to the more familiar time in ASOIAF-verse. Yeah, Joseph Joestar is now Joffrey 'Baratheon', and could still access his hamon AND stand powers. Yes, this is kinda overkill, but hey... WHITE WALKERS, DRAGONS, AND DIRTY POLITICS..._


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

 **Joffrey "Jojo" II**

 **King's Landing - 296 AC**

The cold, stale air of the deserted, supposedly hidden passages of the Red Keep is not something Prince Joffrey enjoyed immensely, especially at the parts where the passage crossed a sewer or two. But still, Joffrey could still imagine the ruckus that will definitely happen when his mother's men found the Crown Prince himself is nowhere to be found. He stopped walking soon after recognizing the certain hole that connected the passage vertically upward directly toward another secret compartment inside his own chamber. Bracing himself against the wall and start breathing rhythmically, Joffrey focused his hamon on his fingertips and start climbing back toward his chamber.

Well, he just can't help himself not to restart his hamon training again, after he directly looks into some dusty dragon skulls stored in the basement. Some nice afternoons where his five years old self bothered Maester Pycelle and later uncle Tyrion to tell him the histories of the past made him aware that wherever he is reincarnated into, this is definitely not Earth as he knew it, and everything point out that magical supranatural stuffs still littered this planet. And let's also mention that his father, Robert Baratheon, literally took the Iron Throne by fighting the previous owner, and there're reports about exiled Prince Viserys Targaryen still living in Essos. Considering how his family, especially those who come from his mother's side, the Lannisters, literally act toward the vanquished Targaryens, he would not be surprised if somewhere in the future, said exiled Prince WILL return, probably with Dragons and or some sort of magical artifacts at his back. Every cliche in the fantasy stories demanded that, especially when his grandfather Tywin supposedly cruelly slain the rest of Rhaegar's family.

Not that he didn't understand on why Robert rebelled, however, this Rhaegar and Aerys must be some sort of epic idiots to start a war over a woman, but still, considering that his own father is such a hypocrite that regularly treat his mother like dirt while fucking other women all around, this is definitely a set up for something BAD for his family in the future. Not that he himself is not a hypocrite, but considering that his old self Joseph never treat Suzie Q like that (other than having flings with several pretty women around and resulting in Josuke - that's not his fault he's allergic to latex, mind you - just he can't help it where women are involved).

Still, he found himself easier to think his own self as Prince Joffrey Baratheon now, instead of the old Joseph Joestar. First and foremost, this way, he would not let his eyes wander near the keyhole on the Queen's room, and second, there would be less confusion on his part regarding going on with his new life. He's not joking with his first reason, since according to old Joseph Joestar's grading system, Queen Cersei Lannister is definitely still a hottie with deadly curves despite already having three children, heck he could swear that even uncle Jaime the Kingsguard seemed to still steal a glance or two from his mother, even despite uncle Jaime never looks that way to other women.

What is he thinking anyway, Joffrey mentally slapped himself, focusing his efforts to climb up, easily remove the wood covering of the hole, put the wood cover back and opened his closet from the inside.

Good, Sandor is still drunk his ass off, said Joffrey to himself while he closed his closet door and took a bucket full of water, before unceremoniously dumping the cold water on top of Sandor Clegane's head.

"Wakey wakey Sandor!" said Joffrey cheerfully while Sandor Clegane mouthed some foul curses before hobbling up from his previous sprawling position on the floor.

"Damn, what?" said Sandor in annoyed tone.

"My mother didn't go looking for me again, right?" asked Joffrey innocently.

"Not at all, but your dwarf uncle does Prince Jojo." said Sandor.

"Nobody knew of the secret passageways yet, right?" asked Joffrey rethorically while Sandor just lazily nod his head. "Tell the servants to drawn myself a nice hot bath, I want to be presentable at the dinner, and not making my mother worried about the dirt on my training armor."

...

* * *

Later that night, Prince Joffrey already has a nice bath and get into his fabulous outfit, consisting of red doublet jacket with Lannister and Baratheon sigils embroidered with golden threads, unbuttoned to shown his well toned muscles on his torso under his black tank top that did not cover his abs (well, he's kind of 10 years old, but he has been working out), black trouser with yellow accents, and his long, wavy blonde hair tied in a low ponytail with gold and black ribbons.

"Hello my fabulous nephew!" chirped his equally fabulous uncle Renly, who sports a dark green robe with golden Baratheon stag sigil at his left side, partially opened top to reveal the equally well toned chest muscles under orange shirt, a matching black trouser with silver accents, and his curly black hair flown free onto his shoulders. "How're you doing today, Jojo?"

"Pretty good, my fabulous uncle!" said Joffrey while fist bumping with his uncle, before moving on and fist bumping with his other friend, his uncle's squire, Loras Tyrell. Said Tyrell worn yet another fabulous outfit consisting of green and yellow jacket with three golden roses embroidered on his back, tight white undershirt that shown his lean, but also well toned muscles, green and white trousers, and his soft curling brown hair formed into a long braid.

"Still working out with the weird yet artistic weapons of yours Prince Jojo?" asked the older teenager courtly while mentioning about how Joffrey supposedly arm himself with several pairs of steel balls, each engraved with initial J on their balls, and each pair linked by strong, braided leather strings.

"Oh this?" said Joffrey nonchalantly while quickly produce his pair of clackers from under his doublet, clacking them with one hand in twirling motion that send a loud CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK CLACK sound in the dining hall. "I just hope Ser Mandon Moore didn't get a grudge on me after I smacked him with these things on the training ground."

"Oh, I'm sure he won't, my nephew." said yet another fabulous man who entered the dining hall, this time the whitecloaked Jaime Lannister giving his trademark charming grin. "We Kingsguards are sworn to protect the Royal family, and after all, that was just a training session and he laughed at your weapon of choice. That's pretty much handle-less flails you have there, a pelicular, but still excellent weapon of choice to catch your opponents off guards." Speaking of which, aside of his white cloak, Jaime wear his golden armor, but without his helmet to show off his long blonde hair, almost identical in shape with Joffrey's and Queen Cersei's hair too.

"That flails of yours definitely packed surprisingly powerful punches too, and you already shown it works even when thrown against hard targets. Must be your father's own penchant with blunt weapons so you picked a weapon that is even harder to use effectively." mumbled Renly while they all share a good laugh. "Yet that was... unconventional weapon you have there."

"Yeah, father told me to just use ball and chain flail rather than these clackers." said Joffrey sheepishly. "Those aren't just as flexible compared to this."

"Sometimes the simpler things are, the better." said someone who could be almost unseen compared to the tall and muscular men gathered in that group. "But enough with these talks about weapons and let's talk something about wenches." Tyrion Lannister grinned while he waddled toward the table. "And while your father didn't give a shit if you skip the lessons with Maester Pycelle, trust me, your Grandfather will not be pleased if you can't do your accounting..."

"Yeah uncle, the next you'll say is 'And simply waste coins in feasts and tournaments so the coffers sink into three millions golden dragons in debt?' Eh?" said Joffrey mischievously.

"...and simply waste coins in feasts, tournaments, and listening to the old coot Jon Arryn, so the coffers sink into three millions golden dragons in debt." Tyrion smirked. "Half of the financial problems could be attributed to your father, yes, but half of them is actually Jon Arryn being a stupid coot who didn't really knew what and who he worked with."

"I do agree with your assessment Tyrion." said Renly with a sigh. "Jon Arryn's influence on Robert is too deep so the King literally cannot change his Hand, somebody other than that old coot deserves the post better."

"Maybe we better talk about this after dinner, as that old coot should be coming here soon." said Loras while everyone in this group chuckled.

...

* * *

 _NOTE : I told you you will lost your sanity reading this. Why? For once, Prince Joffrey "Jojo" would have core allies consisting of (mostly) fabulous men, and that means his uncles Renly, Jaime, and Loras would be there and Tyrion would be there too as I can't see how he won't treat Tyrion nicely. And all of them is pissed off about a certain old coot that is not dead (yet)._


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

 **Robert 1**

 **King's Landing - 296 AC**

King Robert Baratheon, first of his name, smiled when he arrived at the courtyard where training duels are held. At his side, Ser Barristan Selmy and Ser Mandon Moore walked in silence.

Robert spotted his son Joffrey sparring against Sandor Clegane in the courtyard with Ser Jaime Lannister, Tyrion Lannister, Loras Tyrell, and Renly watching at the side, and he decides to announce his presence.

"Halt you two!" said Robert with a big grin on his face. "Sandor, you are dismissed, I wish to knew if the rumors about my son's prowess are valid, or this particular Kingsguard of mine (Robert pointing on Ser Mandon Moore) is rusted enough to end up being shitty duelist against something that could be mistaken as toys."

"Father." said Joffrey, giving King Robert a slight nod while stopping twirling his handle-less-double flails. "What an honor."

"Remember boy, those weapons of yours are definitely not toys. While they are dangerous to your enemy, they still best suited for pretty tricks, and as they could be unpredictable, they could give you grievous self harm." Robert said while maintaining his smile on his face. "That said, Jon Arryn also told me the same when I picked the Warhammer to be my favorite weapon of choice, so let me test your skill with that, personally."

Joffrey looks back at his father and both of them shared a mutual knowing look in their face. "The time is come to test my progress eh? Father?"

"I will fight with padded training hammer this time, can't risk your shrieking mother bitch me more about hurting you with steel." said Robert while Joffrey smirked at his remark.

"Should I use my wooden clackers too?" said Joffrey. "Ser Mandon told me to use the real stuffs yesterday as he wanted to prove that he could cut the rope with a real sword. Isn't that right Ser?"

Ser Mandon Moore just look down in shame while unconsciously caressed the ball shaped deep purple bruises on his face, well, there goes where a Kingsguard end up knocked unconscious by a literal ten years old.

"Well, while I do prefer to have my face unmolested by your balls. I'm still confident enough with my prowess and personal strength" said Robert while raising his padded training warhammer to do some practice blows. "I might be not in my prime anymore, but I still packed a lot of power. I use the padded training hammer to not giving you too many injuries. Fight to surrender or knockout, as usual."

"Alright? so..." said Joffrey while he started clacking his steel ball flails again. "Really father? To put yourself in such disadvantage? Just ask uncle Jaime or uncle Renly, if not Sandor who are my usual training companion, they already said I'm far more than ready to fight a training battle with real weapons."

"Enough talking boy, let's fight." said Robert while moving to the ring and flexed his muscles under his fat.

"Standard rule?" said Joffrey again soon after he entered the ring with his two pairs of flails clacking in both of his hands.

"Dual wielding your weapons, hmm?" said Robert while keeping a ready position. "Ser Barristan, you might be the referee."

As both of the combatants started in their respective corner, Ser Barristan Selmy of the Kingsguard give them the sign to start the fight. Robert thought himself to start out easy so he raised his hands to just start with easy-to-avoid blow.

"Really father? You just brought yourself wide open. Please took me more seriously, I warned you." said Joffrey, but Robert just smirked, confident of himself that he could dodge whatever his son used to attack him, and there are glaring weakness of such short ranged weapons of him, despite Joffrey actually dual wield them.

"Just get in and..." said Robert while Joffrey simply thrown one end of his steel flails against the wooden handle of said training hammer and pull the other ball with his hand. Robert thought that Joffrey might want to just mischievously took the hammer so he pulls back in effort to disarm his son, but then.

*CRACK*

Robert's jaw dropped at how his son basically effortlessly broke the wooden head of the padded training hammer with ease, and how he is now effectively just wielding a wooden stick.

"Next?" asked Joffrey with a smirk. "Told you to use steel weapon against me. This thing could easily break weak wooden parts with simple pull, or disarm unsuspecting opponents with ease."

"That trick would never worked twice with me boy." said Robert with a small laugh in his voice. "Alright, you wanted it then, Moore, bring me my hammer."

And as King Robert get his warhammer, he could see that the Kingslayer and Renly apparently betting something between them. Robert grinned and made sure his grip on the warhammer is good, and he put himself into more defensive position to start the fight.

"Ready?" asked Ser Barristan while giving the combatants the sign, and at the mark, Robert moves to ensnare Joffrey's flail with the steel handle, expecting Joffrey to pull out something similar, but much to his confusion, Joffrey merely ducked a bit to the left.

And before Robert could understand what happened, he feels something tripped his left foot as he moved his right, before long, the King faceplanted with his legs ensnared by those damned steel balls' cord.

Ser Jaime Lannister, Renly and Loras Tyrell tried to hide their amusement with little success, Tyrion Lannister chortled a laugh, while Ser Barristan and Ser Mandon Moore frowned, only Sandor Clegane remained impassive, but his eyes do glint with slight amusement as well.

"Dammit Joffrey, your weapon do have a lot of tricks!" shouted Robert in annoyance but then he himself laughed as if nothing worse happened. "I will take your more seriously now, so..."

"Again father?" said Joffrey with a smirk. "Try not to make obvious moves, I'm not your average ten years old squire, you know."

"Yeah, again." said Robert with a smile. "Where did you learned the trick, is that Renly's or the Lannister's?" Robert laid accusing glances toward his brother and Ser Jaime Lannister. "Or maybe no throwing your weapons this time, and fight like real men."

"Alright." said Joffrey while get himself back ready in his corner, waiting for Robert to stand up while untangling said steel flails from his feet.

"Ready?" asked Ser Barristan again, this time with worried face to both combatants.

As soon as Ser Barristan gave the sign, Robert roared while dropping his warhammer. Robert internally smirked as he formed a simple strategy to took Joffrey off guard this time. He deduces correctly that Joffrey's weapons is indeed some sort of trick weapons, and the best way to negate them are often simple matter of absorbing a blow or two and wrestle them by force. He was proud of his son's cunning sense, but still, he must prove himself as superior, so...

Robert felt a hard blow impacting his helmet, and he falls to the ground realizing that Joffrey actually jumped and deliver a flying KICK to his head, of all things.

"Damn son... fighting you indeed like guessing a mummer's trick." said Robert with annoyance while Joffrey offered his hand to help his father raise from the ground. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Your next line would be, 'Am I really THAT SLOW?'" said Joffrey with a sly smile.

"Am I really THAT SLOW?" Robert said to nobody in particular before gasped and frowned. "Am I too easy to read?"

Ser Barristan coughed politely and King Robert knowing that the old knight might wanted to have a word or two regarding this.

"Your grace, Prince Joffrey is honestly one of the best fighters in the Red Keep. As you can see, he is clearly so far above the other ten years old squires, and when we observe his training fights with Sandor Clegane, Lord Renly, Ser Loras, and Ser Jaime, their fighting styles clearly stressing speed over raw powers." said Barristan politely. "And we must admit that Your Grace do need to be in a better shape to keep up with Prince Joffrey's speed."

"I know..." said Robert with his smile back on his face. "I'm proud of you, My son!"

"Why? Thank you father." said Joffrey politely.

"Ah why not? Even if your fighting style is the opposite of me, I'm glad that you are not some fussy weakling." said Robert with an even bigger grin. "Now I could tell your mother to shut up every time she heard you fighting and bitching about how her poor Prince Jojo should be at her side and learning finer arts instead of fighting like some dumb brutes."

"Oh yeah, mother..." said Joffrey while rolling his eyes. "She obviously dislikes the sight of me fighting, even just on the training ground. I knew tougher women than her with regard to fighting, to be honest."

"Yeah right." said Robert with amusement. "Tonight we feast in your honor, son."

...

As Robert leave the courtyard and let Joffrey returned to his regular training (even if the sight of him jumping around is quite unorthodox to most warriors), he smiled in satisfaction. But then, some spoilsport arrives as his Hand, Jon Arryn walked with thoughtful frown sketched on his face.

"What happened Jon?" asked Robert.

"You let your son made a fool out of you, Your Grace." said Jon Arryn with a frown. "I do understand that you might just want your son to be a good fighter, but he IS your son, and he must show respect to his King, after all."

"So what? I do underestimated his prowess and get humiliated in a friendly spar, but that wasn't a big deal right? Losing a training spar against a prodigy like him only proves that my son is indeed a prodigy, so..." said Robert.

"He had bad influences around him, Your Grace... you know..." said Jon Arryn in a serious tone.

"Hah, I do knew Renly must wrecked Joffrey's sense of fashion, and The Lannister Imp only honed his inherited instinct to leer on pretty women around. Still, no real harm done at all, so what?" Robert is mildly annoyed with Jon Arryn now.

"I didn't wish to sound as if I want to play factions and favorites around the King and the Crown Prince, but the Lannister and Tyrell influences are starting to appear. We just get into some interesting informations that Lord Mace Tyrell will come to King's Landing with his household in tow next month, apparently to pay Your Grace a visit of fealty as well as discussing some recent border spat with Dorne. Still, their intentions is too transparent, as Loras Tyrell is one of Prince Joffrey's close companions, we could safely bet that they would try to formally introduce Margeary Tyrell to Prince Joffrey." said Jon Arryn softly. "That would estrange your brother Stannis even more."

"What? No, I mean, fuck Stannis and his tender feelings, but why the hell they wanted to bind Joffrey this early?" said Robert. "My son need to knew the freedom of being a man without commitment, as... wait, I do promised Ned about a betrothal and..."

Jon Arryn facepalmed while Robert end up more confused with himself. "You promised Ned a betrothal between Prince Joffrey and his daughter? This soon?" asked Jon Arryn.

"Oh well Jon, for once, I do wish to join my family with Ned's, still..."

"All while you knew Prince Joffrey is exactly the same with you when it comes to ogling girls around? When he gets his manhood grown, I would bet that he would eventually rival you in your under-the-pants department, unless we tried to rein him something, so..."

"What's wrong with that Jon?"

"Everything Your Grace... EVERYTHING."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

 **Cersei 1**

 **King's Landing - 296 AC**

Cersei bit her lip while she witnessed her precious golden Prince Jojo slaps a random maid's butt while laughing raucously with Tyrion, Renly, and Loras. Sometimes, at times like this, she wondered on who is his real father, because it pained her mind that her child, her precious golden cub, end up having more traits that would be easily recognizable as Robert's, especially regarding his flirtatious attitudes with women. While outwardly, Prince Jojo definitely has her own gleaming green eyes with lustrous golden mane (that actually looks as beautiful as her own), Jojo's build coupled with well developed muscles at such tender age of ten means everyone who knew Robert always end up comparing him to the younger self of the Baratheon King.

The boys group's previous discussions regarding politics are good enough, but why the hell they end up stopping that after Tyrion mentioned the old coot Jon Arryn, and everything end up in chuckles and lewd jokes, culminating with a dare that somehow involve slapping the butts of some maids that pass by their table.

Not that most of the maids bothered with that, Cersei bitterly noticed. They giggled when Prince Jojo compliments their asses and boobs, and generally flirts back to the group in question. This is all Roberts fault for indulging Her Son too much in what he called 'Let the Boys be Boys', and her own Imp of a brother made everything worse by being there and nudging Jojo to emulate him as well. With both Robert himself, his air-headed brother Renly, and Tyrion making efforts to corrupt her Jojo, she only hopes that at least let Jaime being close to him as well will eventually offset, or at least slow down their efforts to transform Jojo into some sort of mini-Robert. But even with Jaime trying to steer Jojo away from the obnoxiousness of Robert's womanizing excess, she feared that in the end that Robert's imprint might be too strong.

And she's not being a hypocrite with her affair with her true love Jaime, at least she deserves that and she only does that discreetly, dammit.

Speaking of which, as if Jaime could hear her thoughts (it's possible, they are being part of one, in her mind) Jaime gave her a sad yet understanding look from the other side, before joined the group laughing on their table. Cersei gave a silent glare to Jaime, trying to made him steer the conversation of said group toward something less reminding her of Robert, and Jaime quickly gave her an understanding nod.

Cersei could look that Jaime now try to steer the talks toward something more proper, as the group now talking something about weapons, noticeable very well from the fact that Sandor Clegane also joins in the conversations properly now, instead of just laughing at the back but usually never joined their conversation (unless those involving fighting, weapons, or some things that has his main competency in), it seems that the lewd jokes are over.

Not that she want to hear more about the boys' talks, as someone coughs politely at her back, and she instantly knew that the old coot must want to speak something with her right now.

"What is it now, Lord Arryn?" asked Cersei with neutral expression, as she quickly raises her mental shields and gauge the old coot in front of her.

"About Prince Joffrey, my Queen." Jon Arryn said with thin smile on his face. "Let me said that I'm on the opinion about the Crown Prince's well-being. While he is a fighting prodigy and his wit is as sharp as a valyrian steel blade, I'm afraid that he would need some sort of experience outside the Red Keep to round up his upbringing."

"You wish to have him raised somewhere else don't you?" said Cersei with a smirk on his face. The old coot, despite how much Robert think highly of him, is actually a fool compared to the sharp minds of the Lannisters, so much that Cersei decides that being direct with him would be better than beating around the bush.

"Your assessment is correct, my Queen." said Jon Arryn with a slight smile of him remains in his face. "I'm on the opinion that Prince Joffrey would only benefit in the future if only he has the experience of learning firsthand from the best Lords of the realm. And at the same time, there are concerns about the bad influences of his uncles..."

Cersei smirked deeper at the unsaid words between them, both Jon Arryn and herself knew that neither want Joffrey to end up just like Robert, or worse. "Distancing my son from my dwarf brother you say..."

Jon Arryn make a solemn nod while continuing "Correct, and there's also the matter of Lord Renly's influence on the Prince." Cersei bit her lip while noticing the overall 'FABULOUS' apparels of Jojo's group. Not that she did not appreciate the sweaty, muscled men clad in barely concealing cloths, but if the rumours about Renly being a sword swallower is true, or worse.

"Your sincere concern is noted, Lord Arryn, that you brought both the worst elements of my family and the King's own family to your concern, is there anything you want to suggest remedying those problems?" said Cersei.

"Some years in either Casterly Rock or Dragonstone, or both, might suffice, my Queen. Both places have their benefits and drawbacks." said Jon Arryn calmly.

"I will gladly write to my Lord Father to arrange for Prince Joffrey's fostering at Casterly Rock with your help, Lord Arryn." Cersei smiled while she makes a mental victory dance against the old coot Jon Arryn, that he is either too stupid or too much being boot-licker to appease the Lannister family. "I might also notify my Lord Father to effectively forbid my Imp of a brother to interfere at Casterly Rock, but anything regarding the behaviors of Lord Renly shall be your duty."

"I understand." said Jon Arryn with a neutral expression. "I shall speak to the King himself about this. I hope that your father, Lord Tywin, would be most gracious to took a share on his grandson's upbringing."

As she exchanged polite nods with Jon Arryn, Cersei smiled in triumph. That was laughable indeed, the old coot actually speak what she wanted to told Robert about removing Renly's bad influences from her precious Golden Prince. Still, the old coot has Robert's ears better than her, and nobody in their right mind would DARE to actually try to foster Jojo at Dragonstone, that would like fostering him at somewhere far and poor like Winterfell, but worse.

Triumph is Triumph, however, and Cersei smirked at the prospect of having her Jojo raised as true lion of Lannister. While some part of her actually never wanted to be apart with her precious Prince, the more level headed part of her mind actually agree that the best way to wash out the imprints left by Robert, Renly, and Tyrion, is by letting her Lord Father do a job to wash said bad influences clean with discipline.

Cersei silently raise her cup of wine and savor her small victory. Her own maternal instinct could be used to dote on her other golden cubs, Tommen and Myrcella, her ideal children who has no noticeable imprints from Robert, AT ALL. She sips her wine and imagine the day when Lord Tywin deemed Prince Jojo ready to took over the realm, having washed him clean from the corrupting influences that he carried, and Robert could be silently offed and swept under the annals of history.

All is good and would go according to her plan.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

 **Robert 2**

 **King's Landing - 296 AC**

That night after dinner, inside the King's solar. King Robert wondered about his latest debacle with Jon Arryn while sipping his cup of wine slowly.

...

"That's not everyday I heard both you an Cersei agreed to a same thing Jon, but seriously? Casterly Rock?" asked Robert while raising his eyebrows. "I thought you once said that Joffrey should spend some days on Winterfell, but..."

"Because you just revealed that you planned to betroth Prince Joffrey to one of Ned's daughters, Robert." said Jon Arryn with serious face, so serious that Robert himself noted about his usual 'Your Grace' end up slipped to 'Robert' again, not to mention how Jon ends up exuding disappointment all over his face, just like when he first heard about how Robert ends up fathering Mya Stone back when he's still thirteen.

Robert gulped, "But then, even if Jojo end up knocking one of Ned's daughter, that would not against the end result of the marriage plan, aren't they? And speaking of which, Jojo is freaking ten years old Jon, he is not yet..."

"NOT YET? You actually EXPECT your son to..."

"Hey, that's only fair, he's my son and he does took after me. Nothing is wrong with that, some bastards wouldn't hurt him, I..."

"Robert, let me be very frank to you. Have you never learned of anything? The rumors about you aren't exactly flattering in that regards, and the numbers of bastards you fathered are BOTH the subjects of ridicules and end up being the leverage the Lannisters has used, and will continue to use against you." said Jon Arryn coldly. "And there's the mention of how the influences around Prince Joffrey end up formed, you know, with people like Tyrion Lannister and Renly being the closest of your son's friends and de facto mentors, aside of him also being the Kingslayer's Squire, of all things."

"Wait what? Jon, that's not my son's fault he ends up being close to his uncles. If you only brought the Lannisters, I could understand your concerns, but... Renly? Seriously? The worst thing my son Jojo get from him are his fabulous fashion sense." said Robert in confusion. "Sure, he also brought Loras Tyrell to Jojo's circle, but that's not something..."

"And you dismissed the reports about your brother's... unnatural... behavior with said Tyrell boy. And the fact that the Tyrells want to come to visit here soon, can't you connect the dots already Robert?"

"Now that you brought it, what's the harm of a simple visit? Oh sure Jon, I knew about the daughter of Mace Tyrell that would also bring here. You don't think my son would settle quickly with her aren't you? Sure, maybe Jojo would bed her and get her a bastard or another, but meh, if Jojo don't want to marry her, he's free to..."

"And repeat in essence what happened to Lyanna Stark?" said Jon Arryn.

"WHAT? Jon, do not brought that thing again to my mind!" Robert reflexively stand up from his seat and started to seethe. "This is different, and if anything happened to Margeary, everyone will note that she went willingly! Just like Delena Florent, or..."

"And some still whispered that Lyanna went willingly with Rhaegar. Strike me down if you dare Robert, but I just want to prevent something bad to happen to your family if you don't recognize the early signs out of it." said Jon Arryn while Robert sit back on his chair and drank some gulp of wine to calm his nerves. "Not you, and certainly not Prince Joffrey, could be exempted if someone impregnates a Lord Paramount's daughter and trample upon their honor."

"Joffrey isn't promised to anyone yet Jon." said Robert, trying to be as calm as possible. "If something like that happened, wait..."

"And the Tyrell would end up dictating the terms of the marriage to your son." said Jon Arryn with a sigh. "Your Grace, I myself never preferred the Lannister outside of what we must do for the good of the realm. But this time, even the interests of the wiser parts of the Lannisters align with us."

"Heh, you've implied that my wife Cersei is 'among the wiser parts' Jon, did I misheard you or..." sneered Robert.

"Lord Tywin does, your wife, Cersei, is only required for her consent, but from the point of his arrival at the Casterly Rock, Lord Tywin would be assured to try to rein some sort of much needed discipline into the mind of Prince Joffrey." Jon Arryn said while looking out of the window toward the sea. "The other person I gauge capable of providing that is your other brother Stannis, but your actions estranged him much already, and he might not have the required patience to deal with your son, who act exactly like your younger self, just more obnoxious about that."

"You brought up about fostering Jojo in Dragonstone to Cersei?" Robert raised his eyebrows.

"Just as necessary distraction, you know. If I brought the possibility of fostering Joffrey at Casterly Rock, the Queen might think that as attempt from her own father to curb her influence at the court, and would fight against that. Joffrey is not as close with the Queen as his younger siblings, but the Queen do fancy herself of being good with him. With the choices being Casterly Rock OR Dragonstone, however, she would naturally think Casterly Rock as far more pleasant choice for her own sake." Jon Arryn smiled. "And as far as you knew, the Queen is not exactly on her best terms with Tyrion Lannister, and we also knew the same about Lord Tywin Lannister's relations with the Imp. While in the end, we essentially trade a Lannister influence for another Lannister, Lord Tywin would be better compared to said Imp, in the end."

"I understand Jon... but this... Why not Winterfell?" asked Robert.

"As much as I would like that in theory, you already wreck it the moment you said about your hare-brained plan to betroth Joffrey to a daughter of Ned. He might think highly of you as foster brother, but I also knew Ned well, and he would not tolerate well about a goodson who made his daughter grief with said womanizing attitudes." Jon Arryn said while looking into Robert's eyes. "Your actions in particular, did not bode well with Lord Tywin Lannister. I do never expect you to stop being yourself, I just expect you to be more discreet, but here my hopes are dashed, and everybody knew that the King and the Queen could barely stand each others' presence. Having Prince Joffrey fostered by Lord Tywin Lannister would also regain some of his goodwill, instead of trashing it even more by having his disfavored son end up with access to Prince Joffrey's ears."

"... sure Jon, your plan does make a lot of sense." said Robert. "Please give me time to think about it."

"As you wish, Your Grace. And by the way, if you want to still betroth Prince Joffrey to one of Ned's daughters, why not having him being a disciplined Prince who knew one or two things about discretion, rather than, frankly, the younger blonde version of yourself?"

...

And so, this night, instead of spending his time with some floozy, King Robert sat alone in his solar, wondering on how he shall proceed with Jon Arryn's proposal.

If both Jon and Lord Tywin Lannister actually has the same interest, why not having them have a go at it? And as far as the terms being drawn, nothing would go wrong upon it, Robert thought. The agreement to let the Queen to only visit Jojo once a year would be good enough, the formal reason would be to avoid Jojo to be softened by his mother's pampering, but the true reason in Robert's mind is the one to curb Cersei's influence from their son. Lord Tywin would also agree with the de facto ban on Tyrion Lannister AND Renly Baratheon from visiting Casterly Rock outside the schedule, with Tywin hating Tyrion being an open secret, but well, maybe Renly is necessary sacrifice because his fashion sense is too fabulous for their own good.

Jaime Lannister, the Kingslayer himself, however, will stay as part of Jojo's entourage. Formally to be both present as Kingsguard, and finishing Joffrey's training as his squire, and to appease Lord Tywin's demand. Robert just never knew on why Jaime Lannister refuse to return to Casterly Rock and staying a Kingsguard, even when dispensation is just a letter away, but considering that he actually has done a very good work of training Jojo into such fine fighting prodigy himself, perhaps after Jojo is knighted as Ser Joffrey, Robert could formally offer Jaime to end up returned as Tywin Lannister's heir, framed as reward of good service on training the Crown Prince into such fine, if very tricky warrior. Lord Tywin would then agreed on that case with side effects on erasing around half of the debt the Iron Throne owed to House Lannister.

The torn look on Cersei's face when she learned about the final details about Jojo's fostering on Casterly Rock is very understandable though, Jon Arryn might already done the trick making Cersei thinking that the decision to foster Jojo at Casterly Rock is her own pick, but maybe she just realized now that this involve her being only able to meet her firstborn son after a year, and then rarely at best. Her end up freak up and bothering the Kingslayer about everything reminds Robert of how his own late Mother (blessed her name) used to bother his retinues before going fostered to the Eeyrie.

It would be done soon, hopefully before Mace Tyrell arrived at King's Landing. Even Lord Tywin agreed that binding the crown prince that early would be counterproductive at best.

Robert drank more of his wine while looking gloomily outside the window. Time do flies fast.

And he caught something, like moving shadow, crawling? or climbing? At the side of the other window in the dark of the night.

"WHO'S THERE?" Robert shouted and said shadow moves fast and climb even higher, disappearing from his sight by climbing the supposedly smooth surface of the castle wall, leaving only some faint yellow ripple marks who quickly disappear from the wall, which puzzled him some, but the possibility of some kind of assassin or spy. "GUARDS!"

Ser Barristan Selmy and Ser Mandon Moore swiftly move into the solar with their swords drawn, and they called even more guards to their attentions.

"There might be intruder at this castle!" said King Robert while pointing out toward the outside of the window. "I see him, or whatever it was, climbed the wall."

The ruckus happened in this night end up waking everyone in the Red Keep, and through sweep done by men at arms end up taking the rest of the night. With Three Kingsguards stayed together with Robert at all time, The other three end up guarding the Queen and the two younger royal children... And Jaime Lannister end up promising that Prince Jojo would be fine and after some time, appeared with very drunk looking Sandor Cleagane and very dishelved and also wine-drenched Prince Jojo at his side.

Everything seems fine, but Robert did not want to took any chances.

So the morning come, and several guards looking at the wall where King Robert first took notice of the 'intruder', with no other witness, and much to their surprise, found no mark of being climbed at all. The wall end up still relatively smooth and there are no obvious signs of climbing efforts like rope marks or something around that.

"I don't feel as if I was drunk Jon." said Robert toward Jon Arryn at the morning, "But even that, it is definitely real."

"Our current suspect is that a faceless man has slipped inside the Red Keep. But to climb the outside of your solar like that... and to climb vertically on the smooth stones as you describe. Is downright impossible feat without some sort of inside assistance such as with rope or something." said Jon Arryn.

"Nobody are permitted to get into the lower levels before the searches are completed, and anyone suspicious has their face forcibly pinched and searched to look for possible impostor." said Robert. "Everyone who come from the upper levels end up searched for mask or disguises, even including my son and the hound, who somehow getting drunk their asses off on the uppermost balcony. No suspicious things are found."

"I hate to said this Robert, but are you sure you are not drunk?" asked Jon Arryn.

"... better safe than sorry, eh Jon?" questioned Robert rhetorically.

"And both Prince Joffrey and Sandor Cleagane did not notice anything about that, despite from what you said, the shadow apparently climb using some sort of yellow ripples on the wall directly upward near their positions. Well, they're drunk, but if what you said was true, it could be an attempt against the Prince's life." said Jon Arryn.

"Cersei practically shouts at her whitecloaked brother to guard her son with his life, or something to that extent, or else." Jon Arryn said softly. "If not for the possibility that this might be a very serious assassination attempt, I do thought that as amusing. And if this turned to be a false alarm..."

"Oh well... what Jon?" asked Robert while fidgeting nervously. Was he drunk that night? "How's the report of the surviving Dragonspawns and Dorne?"

"That's too early for that conclusion Robert, honestly." said Jon Arryn. "While that's true that Viserys Targaryen apparently has settled in relative comfort as a some kind of sellsword at Braavos, he didn't seem to be the one who would hire an assassin to do his dirty work."

"The fact that he apparently tamed a mysterious sand monster in place of a dragon should be a sign enough that he wanted his father's throne back. If he dare to finally sent assassins against us, we would send our own!" said Robert.

"And if not? You do not want to disturb a beastmaster who successfully repelled Dothraki raid on Pentos more or less single handedly. True, his sand monster is not a dragon, but we shouldn't take chance to disturb him." said Jon Arryn.

"Hmm... maybe this is a chance though, we could speed up sending my son to Lord Tywin. Jojo's grandfather would definitely spend the best for his protection, and unlike this pit of snakes, Casterly Rock is firmly under Lord Tywin's control." said Robert.

"Agreed Your Grace."

* * *

 _NOTE : Dun. Dun. Dun. Did Viserys somehow get ahold of some coffee flavored gum, or something?_


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

 **Jaime 1**

 **Road to Westerland - 296 AC**

Jaime simply didn't know what, or how to say his feelings regarding his imminent return to Casterly Rock, if only for the reason that he was there to both safeguard his 'nephew' and ensure the boy's formal martial educations toward knighthood, even if said boy has proven again and again to be prodigious, cunning fighter that are already fighting on par with the best warriors on the realm.

He even already blooded enough to not be called an absolute greenhorn, having already helped Jaime in a real fight against bandits (just routine patrols and catching some more dangerous outlaws), as he shown firsthand that his flails are definitely a deadly weapon capable to break human heads and inflict grievous harm. Jaime could see that Jojo do have his own eagerness to fight, but still, that could also originate from Robert's.

And let's not talk about Jojo's flirtatious mannerism with girls, and his hobbies that reminds Jaime too much with Robert... or Tyrion, actually. He not yet hit puberty yet, so its just all games and fun talking about girls and stealing chances to peep on them changing clothes or bathing, but when puberty hit him, deep down Jaime feared that Jojo would get his first bastard, or two, and Cersei would have thrown a tantrum in return of 'another bastard staining her family name', just like what she said to Robert, oh well.

Not that Jaime himself mind his nephew if Jojo turned out to be trueborn though, Jojo is among the closest family member he had that get his unconditional trust (other than Cersei - she's his lover mind you), and he loved Jojo for what he is. Cersei also loved her son too, even if she does admit that she once hoped Jojo could act more like Jaime and less like Robert, but well, at least Cersei must never meant that as Jojo end up being with her like...

What is he thinking about? Jaime spontaneously shakes his head and returned his focus to the road ahead, confirming that once again, both Jojo and the Hound still ride safely in front of him, and behind the armored screen of ten Lannister men riding sightly ahead of them, with another eight ride at their back.

Such heavy guards are justified in light of the recent 'problem' at the Red Keep, but still, Jaime could count himself on the few that knew the whole truth about the latest debacle. Not everyone knew that Jojo do have some sort of magical powers, but Jaime is among the three or five men at most who knew the truth. Robert and Cersei definitely didn't know about that, but Jaime never knew if Renly also knew about that, but at most, Jaime knew that aside of him, Tyrion and Sandor also knew about those magical 'Hamon' powers. Not that Jojo like to boast about that, Tyrion already lecturing him on keeping secrets and keeping his cards close to play that at the right time, so.

"I'm bored Uncle!" said Jojo. "And I started to miss both of my other uncles. Why both Father and Mother forbid them to accompany me to Casterly Rock anyway?"

"Eh, well, you knew that your grandfather never liked uncle Tyrion. And your mother do thought that getting too much near Renly might cause your fashion sense to deteriorate into fabulousness that she would not like." said Jaime with a grin.

"Said the fabulous Kingslayer himself." snorted Sandor while Jaime chuckled good naturedly.

"May we stop here for a while and look around, well you know." Jojo said with a wink.

"No and no, the King would not like his son's journey taking too long, and your Lord Grandfather would be worried sick about your safety if we didn't get as quickly as possible to Casterly Rock." said Jaime.

"Aww..."

"Think of this as yet another endurance training, Jojo. And let's be fair, everyone here must be tired of riding. Every time we reached a town we bought new horses to replace the previous, mostly exhausted ones to achieve maximum travelling speed, and the gold your Lord Grandfather spent to ensure your safety is simply enormous." explained Jaime.

"I knew uncle, but still." said Jojo.

"We must reach Westerland proper first, and only by then we could finally take a real rest. Your Lord Grandfather himself would ride to the border to join us with a large host to ensure your safety." said Jaime.

"Yet if we want to get the maximum travelling speed, just ditch the guards and have only you and Sandor ride at my side, that would be all easier, faster, and more discreet. Even cheaper with only replacing three horses every two days compared to replacing twenty-one horses every two days, would be fewer replacements too as we could go faster." retorted Jojo.

"Your mother would not agree with that. Hell, if we actually listened to your mother, she would insist on you travel with a big, thousand strong army." said Jaime with a chuckle.

"And if there's an assassin, he would have easier time slipping in a thousand men host compared to slip into well known eighteen men." said Jojo with a smile.

"You definitely has Tyrion's brain, boy." Jaime beamed with pride. "Still, we only need around a day's ride to get into Golden Tooth and we could finally spend our night in a proper castle instead of camping in the hedges."

"Yeah, Grandfather would wait there, aren't he?" asked Jojo.

"He's a punctual man and he is very eager to see you." said Jaime. "Your mother told him much."

"Last time I see him is seven years ago, didn't know if he still remembers me."

"He will remember you, boy." said Jaime while mentally added to himself 'and my father will continually bug me to left the Kingsguard and return as his heir. I don't know what should I say unto him'.

"You should leave the Kingsguard, uncle Jaime." said Jojo softly. "You know, with uncle Tyrion never had any bastard with his whoring on, you might be grandfather's last hope for having a direct male heir after all."

"Uh, well... you see... the Kingsguard vow is something that could never be easily discarded..." said Jaime nervously.

"Even if you killed the mad King?" said Jojo with raised eyebrows.

"Yeah. He's mad and he need a killing, so..."

"I knew the truth uncle." said Jojo with a sly smile.

Jaime's heart stopped and his smile quickly turned into frown, how could the boy in front of him knew his true reasons. "What did you knew, eh..."

Jojo whispered in a conspiratorial grin, "You're a sword swallower, right? Just like uncle Renly! YOU'RE A FAGGOT!"

Jaime facefaulted, partially relieved at his secret not being known to someone that could be his own son, but partially also want to vehemently deny the accusation and prove his heterosexuality.

"I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT!" said Jojo with a cheerful laugh, while Jaime could only bit his tongue and hope that his father did not do anything... harsh... just like what he has done to put Tyrion on his place with the debacle of Tysha. "The real problem is now discovering who your gay lover are!"

"I AM NOT GAY!" Jaime shouts while everyone in the group chuckled under their helmets. Dammit dammit dammit everything to Seven Hells, why everyone coming into the worst of the wrong conclusions?

"Then why you refuse to leave Kingsguard? At worst your father would get you some fat lady to marry with, and you just need to laid back and think of Westerland." said Jojo with a chuckle.

"Stop it, you bastard!" said Jaime while smacking Jojo's head, while the later just laugh it off. "And anyone else who DARE to mouth it off will forfeit their life ON MY BLADE." threatened Jaime to the rest of the group and the chuckles suddenly turned into silence.

"Aww, mercy uncle... mercy... just joking..." said Jojo with a sly grin on his face.

"Sheesh, dammit... don't joke like that again." said Jaime while his smile returned halfway. "If your Lord Grandfather knew, I would end up under a big pile of shit."

* * *

 _NOTE : Sorry to Joseph/Caesar shippers out there, as told before, Joseph-in-Joffrey would be a skirt chaser despite the Joseph inside Joffrey definitely sounds gay and several shades disturbing if you read it the wrong way. Still, Renly is gay, there's no denying on that._


End file.
